Going Broke Methodically

Image via WikipediaBankruptcy is a legal proceeding in which you put your money in you pants pocket and give your coat to your creditors. – Joey Adams



Remember that even though work stops, nevertheless the expenses continue to mount up. – Marcus Cato



Evolution has her own accounting system and that’s the only one that matters. – R. Buckminster Fuller



Those who work out our federal budget

have a policy – really a honey.

We shall live on our national income,

even if we must borrow the money!

Leverett Lyon



A budget is the way to go broke methodically. – anonymous



I learned more about economics from one South Dakota dust storm than I did in all my years in college. – Hubert Humphrey



One of the great pieces of economic wisdom is to know what you do not know. – John Kenneth Galbraith

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Is Chapter Eleven the result of following the Ten Commandments?

Image by Eliya via FlickrOur accounting department is the office that has the little red box on the wall saying, “In case of emergency break glass.” And inside are two tickets to Brazil. – Robert Orben




Auditors are the people who go in after the war is lost and bayonet the wounded. – P. Rubin



If my business was legitimate, I would deduct a substantial percentage for depreciation of my body. – Xaviera Hollander



Budgeting is a system of additions and subtractions more honored in breach than in observance. – Eugene E. Brussell



I don’t know how much money I’ve got. I did ask the accountant how much it came to. I wrote it down on a bit of paper but I’ve lost the bit of paper. – John Lennon



Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant – even if he wanted to be one. – Jackie Mason



Is Chapter Eleven the result of following the Ten Commandments? – anonymous

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The Other "N" word

Image by Sam Ilić via FlickrThe trouble with the profit system has always been that it was highly unprofitable to most people. – Elwyn Brooks White

Zoologist Desmond Morris once did an experiment that exposed an ape to the “profit motive.” First of all he got it to draw and paint, and found that it was doing lovely things. Then he started rewarding the ape with peanuts for its work.

“Soon it was doing any old scrawl to get the peanuts,” Morris said wryly. “I had introduced commercialism into the ape’s world, and ruined him as an artist. – Thomas Wiseman



Profitability is the sovereign criterion of the enterprise. – Peter F. Drucker



There are occasions when it is undoubtedly better to incur loss than to make gain. – Titus Maccius Plautus



Prefer a loss to a dishonest gain: the one brings pain at the moment, the other for all time. – chilon



Net – the biggest word in the language of business. – Herbert Casson



Few have heard of Fra Luca Parioli, the inventor of double-entry bookkeeping; but he has probably had much more influence on human life than has Dante or Michelangelo. – Herbert J. Muller

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We Put the Douche in Fiduciary

Image via WikipediaStolen from Barry Ritholtz b/c I couldn't resist.

Top 10 Ideas for Goldman Sachs New Ad Campaign



By Barry Ritholtz - September 30th, 2010, 11:30AM Its been a challenging few years for Goldman Sachs. The financial collapse, the bailouts, the SEC case. That damned Matt Taibbi refuses to go away (what the hell is a Vampire Squid, anyway?).




Their latest plan: A PR campaign designed to show the softer side of Goldman, letting the public know what they really do (is that Buffett’s fingerprints we see on this idea?).



As soon as Dealbook reported the plan, we just knew had to help Goldie with such a noble undertaking. So we asked readers to contribute ideas, and soon 100s of suggestions came pouring forth for the new GS ad campaign. These included ad slogans and tag lines, lots of variations of existing campaigns, quotes from movies (especially the Godfather). Oh, and the word Fuck. Lots and lots of uses of the word fuck.



We culled down the entries to a Top 10 list

>



Top 10 Ideas for Goldman Sachs New Ad Campaign



10. Under Buffett’s protection since 2008



9. Putting the zero in zero-sum game.



8. Government Bailout: $29 billion

SEC Settlement: $550 million

Doing God’s work? Priceless.



7. Helping you forget about Bernie Madoff one CDO at a time



6. Goldman Sachs: America’s Counterparty



5. Let us do for you what we did for Greece.



4. Like we give a fuck what you think about us . . .



3. Goldman Sachs: There are some things money can’t buy. For everything else, there’s JPMorgan.



2. The Rothschilds were Pussies



And the number 1 advertising slogan for the new Goldman Sachs ad campaign:



1. We put the douche in fiduciary

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The Pimps Have Taken Over the World

Image by atomicjeep via FlickrWar is good business. Invest your sons. – James A. Michener



All business proceeds on beliefs, or judgments or probabilities, and not on certainties. – Charles W. Eliot



If you destroy a free market you create a black market. If you have ten thousand regulations you destroy all respect for the law. – Sir Winston Churchill



Little by little, the pimps have taken over the world. They don’t do anything, they don’t make anything – they just stand there and take their cut. – Jean Giraudoux



If profits are evil, loses must be ten time worse. – Bertram Troy



If one has not made a reasonable profit, one has made a mistake. – Li Xiannian



It is well know what a middle-man is: he is the man who bamboozles one party and plunders the other. – Benjamin Disraeli

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